Today was the third day in a row that I actually left the house, I mean left and went and had an hour long lunch with my best friend Brenda! And then we went for a ride afterwards too look at all of the beautiful red and golden leaves.
And then it occurred to me that the reason I hadn't been leaving the house, or working in my wet studio that's in the basement was because of Pepper. The constant worry of will he fall down the stairs (seventeen steps), or fall off of the bed, the table, a chair, so on and so forth.
The worry and the stress was real. Taking care of a geriatric pet who cannot tell you what's going on health wise is, well, stressful.
I even spent time in my garden, for the first time in two months, this afternoon.
I'm sad that he's passed, but the stress of knowing I can go on a day trip now, without something horrible happening to him while I'm gone, has been relieved.
Btw the fact that I was house bound was driving my husband John nuts! I couldn't explain to him why I didn't want to leave. And there were times when I questioned his desire to not be home, to spend hours mindlessly shopping. Subconsciously it was because I didn't want to leave Pepper alone, in case he got hurt while I was away.